Shifters, test chapter.

Miscelanious Short Stories
User avatar
Fel
Weavespinner
Posts: 1775
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 6:04 pm

Shifters, test chapter.

Post by Fel » Fri Dec 20, 2013 9:16 pm

This is it, the test chapter I wrote for Shifters.

Constructive criticism welcome. Negative criticism...I know where you live. Remember that.

Enjoy.
Attachments
shifter1.doc
(211 KiB) Downloaded 1400 times
Just another guy from the shallow end of the gene pool.

konman
Katzh-dashi
Posts: 131
Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2008 3:06 am
Location: BC, Canada

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by konman » Fri Dec 20, 2013 9:33 pm

Thanks Fel
Everyone has A photographic memory.
Some just don't have any film!

ralbloke
Sorcerer
Posts: 78
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:37 pm

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by ralbloke » Fri Dec 20, 2013 9:47 pm

Thanks Fel

Oh what we minions have to put up with!!

Yippeee

nachtdemon
Novice
Posts: 24
Joined: Wed Aug 29, 2012 12:06 pm

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by nachtdemon » Fri Dec 20, 2013 10:52 pm

Nice a second dose of fell tonight.

ralbloke
Sorcerer
Posts: 78
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 12:37 pm

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by ralbloke » Fri Dec 20, 2013 11:24 pm

No fair Fel

Write more now!!!

No wait

don't stop adding to inception
Don't stop adding to Earth Bond
Stop sleeping and write!!

Teaser is right!
This could go so many ways.

Thanks a million for all your efforts.

Ralph

User avatar
zedd
Sui'Kun
Posts: 372
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2003 9:04 pm
Location: Portugal

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by zedd » Sat Dec 21, 2013 2:31 am

Hi,
very very good first chapter. Please pretty please more :D

As usual great job. Just as a curiosity, I live something like 70 km south of a guarda :)

Regards

User avatar
Fel
Weavespinner
Posts: 1775
Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 6:04 pm

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by Fel » Sat Dec 21, 2013 2:45 am

zedd wrote:Hi,
very very good first chapter. Please pretty please more :D

As usual great job. Just as a curiosity, I live something like 70 km south of a guarda :)

Regards
Well, mister expert, did I get things at least close to correct? ;)
Just another guy from the shallow end of the gene pool.

soulz
Novice
Posts: 14
Joined: Sat Apr 06, 2013 12:40 am

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by soulz » Sat Dec 21, 2013 3:07 am

You Sir are an evil, evil person! Now the wait is on for more. Pretty exciting introduction to the story.

SYED
Child of Niami
Posts: 898
Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 2:02 pm
Location: ENGLAND

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by SYED » Sat Dec 21, 2013 3:33 am

THanks, for the posting, just wondering when we start the endless and madening arguments, we should do it in the other stories section right, just checking.
.S.A.M.K.M

User avatar
Mizriath
Leaders of the Off-Topic
Posts: 713
Joined: Thu Oct 19, 2006 1:14 am
Location: A city they actually abbreviate to SIN

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by Mizriath » Sat Dec 21, 2013 9:53 am

Constructive criticism.

A bit short. Too short to figure out why Rafael and the pieces of tid bits with the necklace. Too short. Not long nough. Should have stop at least to say who Rafael is and why the shifters are after the necklace. That his father is one of them?? killed by the shifters, betrayed by the shifters cause he a jinnnn.. hmm. Not ehough juice. But good writing. Good start of a plot.
The sea flows as long as Earth exist, Love is alive as long as people exist. I will read Fel's stories as long as my heart still beats.

postal
Initiate
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon May 17, 2010 10:37 pm
Location: Land of the "Frozen Tundra"

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by postal » Sat Dec 21, 2013 10:24 am

Very intriguing, would like to see more. :?

Thanks,
TJ

avalanche_man
Talent
Posts: 7
Joined: Sun May 05, 2013 9:07 am

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by avalanche_man » Sat Dec 21, 2013 10:52 am

Excited for more of this. I have little idea where you are taking it, but if you pull in the occult into this... Man, could be your most intense work yet. Love it, thanks fel.

User avatar
firedrake3
Katzh-dashi
Posts: 107
Joined: Mon Mar 31, 2008 6:51 am
Location: Europe

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by firedrake3 » Sat Dec 21, 2013 1:47 pm

Awesome story. Can't wait to see where you go with it.
An objective definition of "Political Correctness":

"A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical, liberal minority, and
rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the
proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."

SoronelHaetir
Katzh-dashi
Posts: 100
Joined: Wed Jul 24, 2013 3:07 am
Location: Smack dab in the middle of the great wet north

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by SoronelHaetir » Sat Dec 21, 2013 2:45 pm

Certainly an interesting start, thanks for the early Christmas present.

User avatar
AgCOtter
Sorcerer
Posts: 71
Joined: Sun Jan 20, 2013 5:50 am
Location: Florida, USA

Re: Shifters, test chapter.

Post by AgCOtter » Sat Dec 21, 2013 10:07 pm

Once again you cause a person to contemplate something other than our normal everyday life. Thank you. I look forward to seeing your expansion from this beginning.

Appreciate your good work Fel.
"Let's be Very Careful out there people!"

Locked